Scared of Feeling Lonely After Divorce?

July 12th, 2010

The conversation about abandonment and being alone comes up frequently in divorce support circles.

This fear is probably the number one reason women stay in abusive marriages far too long. If it’s not fear of being lonely, it’s fear of being without financial support. These two things direct our choices and create our reality.

One woman shared with me an obsessive fear she had of abandonment. This was a strong, independent, successful woman with an unexplainable hysteria about being left alone. She sought professional help for years with no resolution.

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Liar! Cheater! Divorce Support for Women Who Struggle with Trust

June 5th, 2010

The pain of a broken marriage ripped apart by an affair is a pain so bitter and so deep, women can struggle with trust for the rest of their lives.

And it doesn’t have to be a physical affair that causes trust issues. Sometimes it’s lying that sends us to the edge.

I’m not sure if my ex cheated on me, but I do know I gave him plenty of opportunity to do this. Not only was I emotionally and physically unavailable, but I had a long list of expectations for him. And he never measured up.

And so I resented him like crazy. Read the rest of this entry »

How to Get Divorce Support from Your Family When You Have None

May 25th, 2010

I was lucky enough to have a massage today and I learned about something about family support I want to share with you.

My massage therapist is also an energy healer, so she is very intuitive about my “physicality”. I was having a lot of discomfort in my shoulder blades. Shoulder and neck tension is fairly common, but the remedy she offered was pretty uncommon.

We carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. That is where I feel my stress and tension.

As she was working on my shoulders in a fairly traditional massage movement, she asked me if I feel supported by my family. I said that I couldn’t remember a time when I felt supported. In fact, I feel like I support everyone else.

Do you feel like you support everyone else and you are the last one in line? Read the rest of this entry »

Transition from Divorce to a New Life

May 7th, 2010

My oldest son has reached one of life’s transitions. He is graduating from college in a few days. As destiny would have it he is also ending his relationship with his special girl.

Endings and beginnings are the juice of life, but sometimes it is years later before we look back and taste the savory wisdom.

There is so much uncertainty and discomfort that comes with breakups & transitions.

Divorce is one of those “transitions” that hits the top of the emotional charts… Read the rest of this entry »

Let Go of Clutter and You Are Letting Go of the Past

March 17th, 2010

I’ve been sick this week with a severe belly ache. And although I know the pain is real, I had to consult with Louise Hay to find out what thoughts might create a belly ache for me.

I love using Louise Hay’s book, “You Can Heal Your Life” when I have a physical ailment. She offers you a guide to the emotional and mental source for physical issues. Plus she offers you an affirmation.

The probable cause of my belly ache? “The Fear of Letting Go of the Old and No Longer Needed.”
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HEALING YOUR BROKEN HEART WITH MOVEMENT

February 23rd, 2010

After the divorce, I didn’t want outside activities. I really sought refuge at home. I certainly didn’t have any exercise routine before the divorce, so the idea that I would start exercising, in a public place, wasn’t even on my radar.

In fact, I had some strong resistance to exercise. I did not like to sweat and I was very uncomfortable when my heart started beating fast.

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Getting Unstuck After Divorce

February 15th, 2010

“Don’t Think, Don’t Think, Don’t Think!”

Last summer I was in Ellenville, NY. The weather was less muggy and hot than I expected so the outdoor camp was surprisingly pleasant for August.

I was attending an event organized by T. Harv Eker, called Enlightened Warrior Training Camp. During the course of the 5-day program we embodied a number of warrior affirmations. One of them is, “Don’t Think, Don’t Think, Don’t Think!” Read the rest of this entry »

BLOCKING “THOUGHTS” TO RELIEVE EMOTIONAL PAIN

February 8th, 2010

How would my life be different if I could block thoughts?

Have you ever been to a high school football game?  When you’re right there on the field… the ball is hiked and suddenly there is this crush of energy.  The sound, the feeling, the site… this extraordinary force of human drive comes together to block access to the quarterback…

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A Leap Of Faith After Divorce

February 2nd, 2010

I never realized how my divorce was calling me to take a leap of faith.

Because the day my husband, ex-husband, moved out – that was the day I got confronted by the edge. Do you know what I mean?

I found myself teetering on the “edge” of what would become my new life… I felt alone, uncertain and empty. I couldn’t face it, I turned away. Read the rest of this entry »

WHEN YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT WHO YOU ARE…

January 22nd, 2010

YOU UNCONSCIOUSLY ATTRACT GOOD THINGS

Feeling good about yourself is so much easier to write (or talk about) than it is to accomplish.

Why is that?

I remember when I was going through my coaching certification process…  I had to pass this practical test in which a reviewer listens to your coaching call, scores your performance, and certifies your compliance to the Federation Standards. Read the rest of this entry »